I was on the plane home and my best friend says to me, "you can't stop thinking about him can you?". No... I was a hot mess. I was coming down off a three day bender with no shower, no sleep, no mini bar and no god dam movie in flight. He was ALL I could think about. I had the best conversation of my life, with the most incredible guy I had ever met and as far as I knew, what happened in Vegas was staying there.
I opened my email when I got home. "Best conversation I have ever had." - Scot
Crap. I knew what this meant and I was absolutely terrified. It was a grossly complicated situation and the last thing we ever wanted, was to hurt anyone involved. It was just a conversation in Vegas, but neither of us could let it go. It was time to respectably end our relationships before it went any further. It was the hardest thing I have ever done till this day. It would have been so easy to stay, but it was for the best and I know that now. Our relationships had both been over for some time. But neither parties wanted to self reflect and face this. So many people live in routine and comfort, instead of asking themselves, "Am I truly happy?". Our friends and family thought we were high on glue! Maybe we were, but we took a few weeks, did what we had to do and supported each other through the process of ending both of our relationships. We decided to give it some time and meet for a cup of coffee 1 month from the day we met. It was the biggest leap of faith either of us had ever taken... Blind leading the Blind.
We referred to it as the "meat cleaver". It was like knives in my stomach every time he would text, call or write. It was the most vulnerable state I had ever been in. This guy could bail at any moment and I was so scared that my fate of happiness was in someone else's hands for the first time ever. I had always made safe, smart and secure life choices. I had heard the phrase "better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all". Until my husband, I never understood this. I still look at his little face and am great full for every minute that I get to love him.
What if he changed his mind? What if he was to scared to leave her? What if he wasn't who he claimed to be? What if that awesome conversation we had about our dreams, goals and life aspirations was just a scheme to get me in the sack? Sh*t he could be a serial killer for all I knew! It was Vegas!?!?!? Was I insane!?!?!? How could I end a 5 year relationship for some dude I met in Sin City? I couldn't explain it to anyone and frankly for the first time in my life, I didn't care what anyone was thinking. I HAD to see him again.
What better place to meet for a cup of coffee then the birth place of Starbucks?
Seattle.
Laugh, Cry, Love, Read!
I opened my email when I got home. "Best conversation I have ever had." - Scot
Crap. I knew what this meant and I was absolutely terrified. It was a grossly complicated situation and the last thing we ever wanted, was to hurt anyone involved. It was just a conversation in Vegas, but neither of us could let it go. It was time to respectably end our relationships before it went any further. It was the hardest thing I have ever done till this day. It would have been so easy to stay, but it was for the best and I know that now. Our relationships had both been over for some time. But neither parties wanted to self reflect and face this. So many people live in routine and comfort, instead of asking themselves, "Am I truly happy?". Our friends and family thought we were high on glue! Maybe we were, but we took a few weeks, did what we had to do and supported each other through the process of ending both of our relationships. We decided to give it some time and meet for a cup of coffee 1 month from the day we met. It was the biggest leap of faith either of us had ever taken... Blind leading the Blind.
We referred to it as the "meat cleaver". It was like knives in my stomach every time he would text, call or write. It was the most vulnerable state I had ever been in. This guy could bail at any moment and I was so scared that my fate of happiness was in someone else's hands for the first time ever. I had always made safe, smart and secure life choices. I had heard the phrase "better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all". Until my husband, I never understood this. I still look at his little face and am great full for every minute that I get to love him.
What if he changed his mind? What if he was to scared to leave her? What if he wasn't who he claimed to be? What if that awesome conversation we had about our dreams, goals and life aspirations was just a scheme to get me in the sack? Sh*t he could be a serial killer for all I knew! It was Vegas!?!?!? Was I insane!?!?!? How could I end a 5 year relationship for some dude I met in Sin City? I couldn't explain it to anyone and frankly for the first time in my life, I didn't care what anyone was thinking. I HAD to see him again.
What better place to meet for a cup of coffee then the birth place of Starbucks?
Seattle.
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